Here are some witticisms I have recently heard from a 4 year old. Background for those unfamiliar, there is a page in the book Everyone Poops that says "A one hump camel has a one hump poop. A two hump camel has a two hump poop. Only kidding!"

Punkin: "A two hump camel has a two hump poop. Only kidding! There is no such creature as a two hump camel!"

Playing Dr. Panda's Restaurant on her tablet in the backseat:

Punkin: "Daddy, Dr. Panda makes me do all the work!"

During breakfast:

Me: "Eat your bacon, it makes you grow strong." Punkin: "No it doesn't." Me: "What does it do?" Punkin: "It makes you wiggle your butt!"